My Adult Views

The last guy that I wasseriouslydating cheated on me with my best friend and ever since then I have been having some really big trust issues. We broke up over a year ago and that's why I can't believe that I am still having problems with it, but every time that I start getting close to a guy I begin to doubt and obsess and next thing you know it I have ruined the relationship and the guy ends up breaking up with me. I have turned from a happy, passionate, fun loving girl into ajealous,crazypsycho and of course no ones wants to date a crazy jealouspsycho.

The worst thing about this is that some of the guys I have been dating since then have been really great guys who probably will make wonderful husbands. When I think of how I could already be in a serious relationship with any one of them but that instead I am still single and dating and all because I ruined it for myself. Plus I ruined it because of him, the serial cheater, the best friend stealer, the guy who ruined my life, he has made me into this horrible monster that no one wants to be with.

So now the issue I am trying to deal with is that I was invited to go out this Friday but now I am even scared to go out again and scare another guy away. The guy that asked me is a very cute guy that works in my building and I have always had a secret crush on him. Usually I see him dating some really beautiful girls and was surprised when he said hi in the elevator and then in a whisper said that he'd love to go out with me Friday. I looked thinking he was joking but he wasn't and I happily said yes but now I am dreading starting something with someone I really like that will most likely end in ruins.

I don't want him to hate me so I either have to cancel the date or completely change my ways. Though how I change the person that I have become is not something I know how to do. I know that if any one isworthchanging for it is him so maybe I can give it a try. I would hate to give up this shot I have at going out with him after liking him so long.